A Kiss for Cade Page 19

  “Only that you announced the sickness was measles instead of the fever.”

  “That’s what I told them. I thought it’d be easier to get the town together than send someone from house to house.”

  “I’m sure everyone was relieved at the news.” She carried a stack of sheets past the cell and stored them on the shelf.

  “They seemed to be.”

  “Anything else going on?”

  “Folks are up in arms about Laticia. Don’t want her comin’ round to cause trouble. You know how she can be.”

  Zoe knew exactly how Laticia was. She’d been at the jail twice in the past twenty-four hours, harassing Cade. But Gracie’s hospitality and unequaled pot roast had kept Laticia comfortable in her quarters and likely to stay past her welcome.

  “Well,” said Zoe, “in a few days Cade will be well enough to settle his business with Bonnie and Seth.” It wasn’t a pleasant thought, but she had to face reality. Without the children, she might sell the store, maybe wait tables for GloriLee. She had tried to hold on to Jim’s heritage, but she was too tired to fight anymore.

  The front door opened, and Seth walked in. Pop smiled. “Morning, Seth. How’s Bonnie?”

  Seth took off his hat. “She’s feelin’ much better.”

  “Stay for a cup of coffee?”

  “No, can’t socialize. Came to talk to Cade.”

  Pop nodded toward the bunk. “You’ll need to take the pillow off his face so he can hear you.”

  Seth stepped into the cell. Bending over, he lifted the pillow. “Kolby?”

  Cade blinked.

  “Got some bad news.”

  Zoe winced when she heard the gravity in Seth’s voice. Was there anything but bad news in Winterborn?

  “What?” Cade asked.

  “Me and Bonnie can’t take the kids. We had a long talk last night, and we decided we want to have a couple more young’uns of our own to fill that extra room I’m building.”

  Cade swung his feet to the side of the bunk and sat up. “What?”

  “I know it’s disappointing, but me and the missus don’t think we ought to take on Addy’s kids.”

  “But the kids would make you a good family,” Cade argued.

  “Four more would likely be a strain, Kolby.”

  Cade got up from the bunk and started to pace. The worry in his eyes broke Zoe’s heart. “I was counting on you, Seth.”

  Zoe swallowed a leap of anticipation when she realized Cade was slowly running out of options. Surely Seth’s decision would make him realize he had to give the kids to her. He had no other choice.

  Seth reached out to shake hands. “I hope you don’t hold it agin me, but I thought you’d want to know now rather than later.”

  Cade shook hands, nodding. “Sorry it didn’t work out.”

  Seth put his hat on. “Hope you’re feelin’ better soon. When the rash comes, a little bakin’ sody on those spots will help the itchin’.”

  Seth left the jail, closing the door behind him. Zoe could have heard a pin drop as Cade sank back to the bunk and put his head in his hands.

  Pop sat at the desk, running his forefinger and thumb through his mustache. Outside, Seth whistled to his team, and a moment later his buckboard rattled off.

  “Well, now.” Pop lowered his splintered leg to the floor. “Who wants a cup of coffee?”

  “Zoe,” Cade called, “get me a steak from GloriLee’s.”

  “GloriLee is right in the middle of cooking dinner. You’ll have to wait.”

  “I’m not waiting. I’m hungry. I need to get out of here and take care of business. What was the name of that Amish family you mentioned, Pop? The couple over near Salina? I’ll ride out there after dinner.” He stood up and then swayed before he could take a step.

  “You’re not riding anywhere,” Zoe scolded. “You’d scare a body to death, white as a sheet, shaky legged and wild eyed, talkin’ crazy with fever. Get back on that bunk!”

  “I’ve got four kids who need a home. They’re not going to get one with me lying around here.” Cade reached a trembling arm out for his hat, holding on to the bunk rail for support. “If you won’t go after that steak, I will.”

  Zoe blocked his exit from the cell. “Over my dead body.”

  Cade towered above her, his features hard. “I’d prefer to do this peaceful, but I am bigger than you.”

  She lifted her chin. “You’re not leaving this cell.”

  “Step aside, Red.”

  “No.” She crossed her arms and planted her weight. “This could be easily settled if you would only listen to common sense. Bonnie and Seth can’t take the children. Everyone else has children, or doesn’t want more. That only leaves me—me, who is ready and willing to take them, so you can get on with whatever it is you’re in such an all-fired hurry to get on with!”

  “Get out of my way, Zoe.”

  “I have your gun.” Her chin motioned to the cabinet. “You’re not going anywhere.” His dark look didn’t shake her.

  “You think I’d let you disarm me?”

  “I did, didn’t I?”

  Leaning down, he took a small pistol from one of his boots. The weapon dangled from his forefinger by the trigger guard. “Oops.”

  His insolence did not deter her, nor did his cocky attitude. “When you’re sleeping, I’ll get that too.”

  “I said, step out of my way.”

  She swallowed, holding him at arm’s length when he tried to push past her. “Pop! Help!”

  Pop got up from the desk and hobbled to the cell. He paused, his eyes focusing on a corner near the bunk. “Is that Bonnie’s ear-bob?”

  Zoe’s gaze swung to the cell floor. “Where?”

  “Right there, beneath the bunk. That sparkly gizbob. She’ll be wantin’ that, won’t she?”

  Pushing past Cade, Zoe walked into the cell, dropped to her knees, and peered under the bunk. “Where? I don’t see anything.”

  “Show her, Cade.” Pop pointed with one crutch. “It’s right there.”

  Cade knelt beside Zoe. “I don’t see anything.”

  Her head shot up and banged against his when she heard the door of the cell clang shut.

  Kolby got to his feet. “What do you think you’re doing?”

  Pop turned the key in the lock, a big grin on his face. “I’m doing you a favor, son. You two ain’t comin’ out ’til you decide who’s gonna take those kids. You or her. You got the whole dadburned town in a uproar tryin’ to figure this thing out! And now Laticia’s breathing down our necks. Some of us need relief!”

  “Pop! Have you lost your mind?” Zoe ran to the cell door, clasping the bars. “Open this door immediately! The children need—”

  “I’ll look after the children,” Pop said. “You just get your business in order.”

  “I have ironing sprinkled down, and it’ll mildew!”

  “That’s a mighty good incentive to get this over with as quick as possible, don’t you think?”

  “Pop, open this door,” Cade demanded. “I haven’t got time to play games.”

  Pop hung the key over a hook in the far corner of the room. “Sorry. I can’t hear nothin’ but Ben Pointer’s hammer hittin’ against the anvil.”

  “Pop!” Zoe and Cade chorused loudly.

  The sheriff limped back to the cell. “You two can stay in there ’til you’re old and gray, or you can sit down and talk this thing out like sensible adults. It’s your choice, but you ain’t leavin’ ’til you’ve worked it out. When you come out of that cell, the arguments will be over, and those kids better have a home.”

  Zoe stared at him.

  Pop glared back. “Your pa would whup you for actin’ this way.”

  “This isn’t fair. Cade has his mind made up. For his own selfish, impractical, improbable reasons, he won’t let me have the children.”

  Cade’s jaw firmed. “She’s not getting them.”

  “See? He’ll never consent to give them to me.”

 
“Never,” Cade agreed. “So stop wasting our time, Pop.”

  “That’s too bad. You’re talkin’ like you’re going to be in there a long spell. But I have faith in you. If you think about this long and hard enough, the answer will come to you.” He leaned closer to the bars. “I’ll give you a hint. The answer’s right in front of your noses. Has been all along.”

  Cade rattled the bars. “Why don’t you just tell us what you have in mind and spare us the trouble?”

  “Nope. That’s your job.”

  Turning, he thumped out the front door and closed it behind him.

  “Sawyer!”

  Sawyer sprang to his feet. “Yeah, Pop?”

  “Still got that credible stuff?”

  “Yep.”

  “Don’t let anyone come in ’cept GloriLee with the food.”

  Sawyer grinned, patting his badge. “Yes, sir.”

  Nodding, Pop hobbled across the street.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Zoe glanced at the wall clock. Two hours they’d sat in silence. How long could they keep it up?

  She glared at Cade. There he lay, hat over his face, ignoring her.

  “Cade.”

  “What?”

  “This is insane. If we’re ever going to get out of here, we have to talk.”

  Rolling off the bunk, he stepped to the window to peer through the bars. “We can talk until the rapture, and you won’t change my mind. I’m not giving the kids to you.”

  Measles or no measles, he needed a good throttling, Zoe decided. “Fine, but soon it’s going to be out of both our hands.”

  Cade turned to look at her, his eyes bright with fever. “Pop can lock us up, but the decision is still mine to make.”

  “Laticia says she’s taking the kids home with her. If we’re both locked behind bars, she’ll do what she wants.”

  He returned to sit beside her on the floor.

  Zoe reached over to feel his forehead. “You’d better lie down. You look sick.”

  “Isn’t that how most starved men look?”

  “Stop complaining.”

  “My head hurts, and it’s from not eating.”

  “You’ll be fine in a day or two, as soon as the spots appear.”

  “That’s all I need. Spots.”

  “Spots are the least of our worries.” She sighed, resting her head against the wall. “If I were to get on my knees and beg you, would that convince you to let me have the kids? Wouldn’t that make more sense than handing them over to Laticia?”

  “Am I mumbling words? No, I said, no.” Cade got up and moved to the bunk. Wadding the pillow under his head, he sighed heavily and stretched out.

  “Am I so incompetent that you don’t trust me with their welfare?”

  “I know you’d be a good mother.”

  Rising, she picked up the other pillow and gently whacked him on the chest. “You stubborn mule!”

  He grabbed the pillow out of her hands and pitched it to the floor. “You won’t give up, will you?”

  “No.” She crossed her arms.

  Sitting up, he took a long breath and released it slowly. “All right. I didn’t want you to know this, but there’s someone dead set on killing me before I get him. His name is Hart McGill.”

  Her hand flew to her throat, and she suddenly felt sick to her stomach. Kill him? That wasn’t surprising, not in view of his vocation, but he made it sound as if McGill had made it a personal vendetta. “What does that have to do with me having the kids?”

  “McGill’s out for revenge. He already killed my best friend. He’ll kill anything or anyone connected to me.”

  “He’d kill children?” She couldn’t imagine what kind of animal would kill innocent children.

  “He’d pistol-whip a hummingbird if it suited him. When we meet up, only one of us will walk away.”

  She sat on the bunk beside him, trying to understand. Her hand crept over to cover his and the silence continued. Finally, she said. “Why would he hate you so?”

  “I killed his brother.”

  “Cade. For money?”

  “In self-defense. I was taking the man in when he turned on me. It was either me or him, Red. I chose me.”

  “Does McGill know where you are?”

  “I don’t know. I spread word around that I was on my way to St. Louis, but he’s no fool. I have to get the kids settled and move on before he realizes he’s been tricked.”

  “That’s why you’re so eager to leave? Because you think you’re endangering the children’s lives?”

  “If I stay, McGill will come to Winterborn.” With a finger under her chin, Cade made her look at him. “I won’t put the children, or you, in his path.”

  “I’ll move.”

  “No. I have to place them with someone who has no connection to me. You and I go way back. It would be careless to leave them with you, and I’m not just thinking about the kids. I’m thinking of your safety too. I always have been.”

  Finding her voice, she said, “You’re right, of course.” Her words were barely a whisper. “The children must come first.” She slid off the bunk and paced the small cell. “But Laticia. Letting her have them isn’t the answer. McGill could easily come after her too.”

  “Not a chance. One look at her, and he’d run like the yellow belly he is.”

  She smiled, aware that he was trying to lighten the mood. “The kids would be miserable with Laticia. Cade, please. I’ll do anything to keep them with me. I’ll move, change our names. Anything.”

  “Red.” He reached out to her, and she went to him willingly. Resting against his chest, with his arms wrapped tightly around her, she felt protected from the McGills of the world. “I can’t let you move and change your name. This is your home.”

  She jerked back. He knew nothing about her. Nothing. She’d kept the truth bundled up for so long, she was about to burst. “If those kids are taken away from me, I’ll have nothing.” The only weapon she had left was the truth, as painful as it was. She didn’t want his sympathy, but she wanted Brody, Will, Missy, and Holly badly enough to risk it all. “I’ll never have children of my own.”

  “Of course you will—”

  “I can’t, Cade. I’m barren.”

  “Barren?”

  “Yes, barren.” She watched as his eyes darkened. Pain crossed his features. He gently pulled her back to him. She laid her head against his breastbone, choking back tears.

  “Are you certain?”

  “Years ago, I—” It was hard. She had kept the awful secret hidden for so long, she couldn’t find the words or the heart to bare her soul.

  “You could be mistaken. Maybe your husband couldn’t—”

  “It wasn’t Jim’s fault.”

  “Did he talk to Doc Whitney?”

  “He didn’t have to.”

  Cade nodded. “Pride. But if he wanted—”

  “Jim wanted kids as much as I did. Darn you, Cade!” She sat up, fumbling for his handkerchief. “You owe me Addy’s kids!”

  “How do you figure?”

  She sniffed, dabbing the handkerchief at the corners of her eyes.

  “Are you going to tell me why, or are we playing guessing games?”

  She sniffed again. “How could you be so blind?” He couldn’t know the can of worms he was opening, he couldn’t, but maybe it was time he did. It wouldn’t change an iota of their lives, but he should know.

  “Cade.” Her hand caressed his cheek. He was so hot with fever. “I… don’t know how to say this. Addy wanted to tell you, but I wouldn’t let her. I had such bitterness in my heart.” There was no kind way to say it, no way to spare his feelings. “I was carrying your child when you left fifteen years ago.”

  The words sounded like a cannon shot in the quiet cell.

  He stared at her. “What?”

  “Shhh—just listen.” Dredging up the past reopened the hurt, deep shame, and pain. Sin had a way of demanding its due, though the act, if asked, is completely forgiv
en. She’d had to work hard on that one. She had lived through long years of feeling as though God had punished her, when in truth he had supplied the grace of forgiveness. Years later, Jim had taught her the beauty of the marriage bed and the joy of God’s creation, and the covenant between a man and a woman. She and Cade had given in to a moment of passion, but now they both knew and understood well the consequences of defiance. “At first I was ecstatic. We were going to have a baby. You and I had created a tiny human being. I couldn’t wait for you to come back home so I could tell you. I thought we could marry quickly, and your parents and Papa would never know. We wouldn’t hurt them with our disobedience to the Word. We’d need only ask God for forgiveness. That was my youthful logic.”

  He shook his head, disappointment in his eyes. “Why didn’t you let me know?”

  She bit her lower lip. “When you didn’t come home…after a few months I was afraid I couldn’t keep the baby a secret…I got scared. At the time Papa was still alive, and I certainly couldn’t tell him. I had no one to tell except Addy. I cried constantly. Then the bleeding started. All that blood.” She choked on a sob.

  He reached for her hand, but she jerked away. “Don’t—” She felt driven to confess, to relieve the awful hurt. “Addy found me the night I lost the baby. If it weren’t for her, I would have died. She nursed me back to health and never told my secret.”

  Cade pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. “She never said a word… If I had known. I’m sorry, Zoe.”

  She sobbed harder. “I’m sorry too. Sorry we never got to see our baby.”

  “Did Ma know?”

  Zoe pushed away, wiping her eyes. “Senda? Goodness, no. If she’d known, she would have come after you and dragged you back by the ear.”

  “Someone should have.”

  “I didn’t want you to be dragged back. I wanted you to come of your own accord.”

  He pulled her back, stroking her hair. She felt peace for the first time in years. “I don’t hate you, Cade. I thought I did at the time, but that’s over now. I learned long ago it’s easier not to care than wish for something you’ll never have.”

  “I should have been with you.”

  She lifted her head to look him in the eye. “What I don’t understand is that Addy knew the doctor had told me I could never have children after that, yet she left her children to you, not me, despite how much I love them.”